Heading On

towards the outside world.... i see myself as nothing without friends, family and my dear.... i m cant survive a minute without them.... i juz hope that there's a day when they realise they meant everything to me... finding the right path is juz so complicated... today realistic world... without a house and car... our life wont be complete... there are rich and poor people... and there are people fall in between them... trying to struggle to the way up higher... i desire, i hope, i wish everyone can live together as peace and harmony...
if today i write this,, there might be a time,, i cant afford my own electric bill,, and i stop writting my own blog... i feel my life is dropping to a trap... a trap where everyone pushing each other for their own survival... at last the loser will be in the street... and the winner claim the honour to stay in a good environment....
for my lack of intelligent,, i realli cant understan,,, why everyone cannot compromise?? if everything is worth a price,,, why still some people cant worth to buy?? i figure out there are many factors to consider..... we cant state an intelligent person can hav lots of money.... our environment, history build who we r now.... i am the kind of people who learn the past and dun wan to forget the sad things.... experience is what we gain.... if we throw away that most valuable thing of our life,, how could we can avoid making the same mistake???
through studies,,, qualifications,,, does any of these make us a better person??? does any of these help us find a job??? i most probably think that,,, if i am the boss,,, i will hire an experienced worker with lower salary,, rather than a high qualification student on a job... the state of risking the company progress is much higher wit high qualification student becoz,, everything in the company dont apply 100% on text book or lecture.... real job require skill and understanding,, yet a little of knowledge....
for an exceptional case which include physician and lawyers,,, both needed high in knowledge and experience..... legal practise is juz too much to learn before going out to the real world....
as i dunno why we as chinese dont satisfy our status in malaysia.... sure ya,,, there are special right for bumiputra but we still living in peace way.... how things happen and others will come distorted the whole matter till it goes in high social level.... people stay in one word.... citizen is one word... country is one word.... everyone giv a little bit,, and everyone get a little bit... doesnt dat juz be great??? why must there be selfish people who thoughts only come in one way??? think of both way before act is better,,, the point of view is one because it comes from our ownselve,,, if we gather all our friends opinion which comes in different direction,,, and maybe we get different thoughts....
different people,,, different personality,,, different actions,,, different way.... dats why old times goes lik " the world is fill with colours" which sounded so beautiful.... and as it is juz to warn us,,, better to be aware of everything happen around us..... there might be a time it will strike you....

FeelingBored

Paiseh

today i went to bibi relative wedding lo.... so many ppl i dunno.... pai seh nya..... shame shame lo..... bibi very bad..... bully me lo.... hmmmm...... blekkkkk........

Rainy Days

Its been awhile since its not raining in the midnight,,, its so cold.... Still remember back den when we were trying to get to PD beach.... Atleast there's some place to shade the rain..... We had our most enjoyable times..... not the most but,,, still ok gua.... One thing for sure,,, they ate my homemade cake..... Not bad for an amature.... Well,, didnt vomit or stomachache or something un-cool? no,, right? ok.... good things come,, i juz wan them come even more....
Lots of things i learnt,,, and one of most important is trust.... For me,,, growing up with full of back stabs and lies,,,, trust juz didnt come so straight forward for me..... To gain that,,, i really tried my best,,, its like a second nature to me,,, a reflex everytime i sense something...... Now,,, i hope for the better,,, and the best yet to come.... Trust,,,i believe,,, in my word,,, i will bring down my knees one day,,, and beg to let me be ur husband,,, TanXueYan.....
But for now,,, i must earn lots and lots of money,,, so that till dat day,,, when u r tired,,, i can tell u,,, "hey,,, u can rest on my shoulder for the rest of ur life".....

Her Tears

the things inside that box realli will hurt me so much?? even i haven open the box,,, i alredi hurt... becoz i saw the box alredi.....
wang le ba.... wang le ta..... wang ji ta ba..... inside the box is not important..... i dun wan to know..... i dun wan to know.... i dun wan to know.... i wan to be happier.... i wan u to be at my side.... i wan u to be at my side forever.... i wan to hold ur hands.... i wan to touch ur face and kiss u.... nothing can set us apart.... not even the devil inside my mind....

New Song

哪里有彩虹告诉我
能不能把我的愿望还给我
为什么天这么安静
所有云都跑到我这里
有没有口罩一个给我
释怀说了太多就成真不了
也许时间是一种解药
也是我现在正服下的毒药
看不见你的笑我怎么睡得着 你的身影这么近我却抱不到 没有地球太阳还是会绕
没有理由我也能自己走
你要离开我知道很简单

你说依赖是我们的阻碍
就算放开那能不能别没收我的爱

当作我最后才明白

有没有口罩一个给我
释怀说了太多就成真不了
也许时间是一种解药
也是我现在正服下的毒药
看不见你的笑我怎么睡得着
你的身影这么近我却抱不到
没有地球太阳还是会绕
没有理由我也能自己走
你要离开我知道很简单
你说依赖是我们的阻碍
就算放开那能不能别没收我的爱
当作我最后才明白
看不见你的笑
要我怎么睡得着
你的身影这么近我却抱不到
没有地球太阳开始环绕环绕
没有理由我也能自己走掉
是我说了太多就成真不了
也许时间是一种解药解药
也是我现在正服下的毒药
你要离开我知道很简单
你说依赖是我们的阻碍
就算放开那能不能别没收我的爱
当作我最后才明白

Stress

I am going to burst.... I cant fail... I am not prepared... Studying like a dog...
Erm,,, relaxed today,,, din study... hopefully... i will pass....